Mid Year Performance Reviews

Halfway through 2026.

I am currently reduced to one screen using this laptop and it is not the screen I like to use.

In general. Which is an annoyance to add to this 'mid year performance review' post.

This screen is on my left, and it is a perfectly good screen, same size as the one that sits to its immediate right.

But it is not the 'main screen', and I know that you know what I mean.

It is the screen that gets used for non essential but still important stuff, like your email inbox... The 'watching brief screen' whilst you deal with the REAL STUFF on the other screen, you know the world changing shit you do on a daily basis. But, for some reason the laptop has decided to no longer recognise this main screen via USB-C and as such I am now finding muscles in my neck that I did not know existed as I turn to look at the left hand screen and type. Ignore the above, that was grumpy Paul speaking. My faithful know him well. Ha Ha I am now 'reduced' to the laptop alone, I have given up trying to get it to talk to the screens.

It's liberating. I am, as of typing, sat at my dining table, the bi-folds are open and the summer nights (Well-a, well-a, well-a, huh) breeze is on my back.

I got 'pulled' today.

What?

What?

What?

I will possibly keep writing 'What?'' until I find the words to describe what happened.

What?

Strap in.

As of this post I have spent many days in The Loopy Shrew, alone and even sometimes with a lady.

Mainly alone.

Ssshhhh I know.

I woke, as normal, on Saturday morning, hangover free, did the housework, I went to the gym (great session) watched the F1 quallies and then thought 'I fancy a beer'.

The local 'Spoons was rammed and the app was not working, so I decided that maybe my bank account could accept a slight assault. Sorry https://www.loopyshrew.com/, I adore you but... Dollar Dollar Bill Y'all

I threw some basic clothes on, shorts and a thin hoodie (the one I bought in Santa Cruz CA, from O'Neill, makes the arms look ok'ish, shush) grabbed my book, walked in, sat in my favourite spot with a large merlot and was a pig in poo.

The spot, where I like to sit is specific.

I have full view of the whole bar, doors in and out and nobody can sit behind me. Yeah, if you know, you know.

I had two large Merlots, read three chapters and was happy to go home and cook a Chow Mein as was the plan for my evening.

As I was leaving, a lady was walking towards me and being the gent I am (I am. Shut up. I am. Ssshhh. Come on.) I stepped aside to afford her room, she was pretty, petite, my age (or so) she smiled, thanked me and I replied with 'no worries' or something equally innocuous.

I am so out of practice, ha ha.

I made it about three steps out of the bar, barely got my headphones in when somebody tapped my shoulder.

No

It wasn't the lady I was so deferent to, but it was her mate.

Apparently, sitting alone, drinking red wine and reading a (proper) book is attractive.

Who knew? Clearly not me who has done the same thing in numerous bars for years, yet never been approached.

Her words were along the lines of;

'You're hot and seeing you sat there reading a proper book alone, and not caring that you are doing so is hot and my mate thinks so too and she went to the bar to say hello, but you left, so I chased after you, please say you are not married, waiting for a girlfriend or gay'.

My initial response was to blush, and say thank you, but no thank you. See I said I was out of practice.

She persisted and I caved.

I went back in, I met her friend and we chatted. It was lovely.

No.

Keep the hat shopping on hold.

She is lovely, she is slim, attractive, in a bohemian way, but.

Nope.

Well. A post that was meant to be about being halfway through 2026 took a tumble huh?

Sorry, it was fresh in my mind, so I thought I would say it out loud and now I hear it, for what it is.

Sorry. Again. Friday night Lucy and I saw Paul Weller

Paul Fucking Weller

In Ludlow Castle

And he was fucking amazing, simply sublime. https://www.facebook.com/paul.getty.5/posts/pfbid035X9DR4S7tSxbTBusRb9gxNdmzeKJX7orNP4BA24HgWQAhxUgzSG55iUvZyCBFVNRl?locale=en_GB

I once got called a lefty for using the word sublime, honest.

My response?

"Why do think that calling someone 'lefty' is an insult"?

I will save you from the level of illiteracy from my accuser that followed that discourse.

Save to say, it fell in my favour. I am not a 'lefty'. I am not sure I know what one is, but I do lean away from the right when I walk.

Mr Weller was not overly political, not as far as I was expecting, he took a moment, with full respect to his audience, to mention Palestine, then he sparked up a cigarette and wowed us for nearly two and half hours.

And now we get to the crux of the post.

Midway through 2026. How has it been?

How is the Mid Year Performance looking?

I have itchy feet. It might be fungal, ha ha, still got it Getty, still got it.

Normally that means I am looking to throw everything in and do something radical. Like;

Leave my wife and lose everything we had built for the last 15 years.

Or;

Sell everything and move into a van and lose everything I had built for the last six years.

You know me by now.

You know the patterns.

Do I want to quit my job and career, sell everything again, move to a van or boat and disappear.

Yes, I really do. Daily.

But, it is not something I am going to act on, yet it does suggest to me that something is not sitting right.

But what?

I honestly have no idea, the summer so far has been amazing, heatwave after heatwave, I am in the middle of gig season and have many more lined up.

Back to back concerts next weekend, Richard Ashcroft with the Pinkies and then Scissor Sisters with Lucy, both at Ludlow Castle, which is proving to be a superb venue for live music

https://www.liveatludlowcastle.co.uk/

In four weeks I will be in America, this time it is really special as Sam is getting married, this is the legal one, small gathering, the couple (of course) Annie's parents and me.

Then Lucy, the girls and I are off to Dublin, bit of sightseeing before seeing Mannequin Pussy and Amyl and the Sniffers, and I am so excited for that pairing!

Get September (and turning 54, urghhh) out of the way and then we have the wedding weekend in Scotland in October and more gigs!

It will soon be dark at 1600hrs and the shops will be full of Christmas tat, which will possibly bring out the grump in me, ha ha.

So what is missing?

A lady? Nope, not that. Work? No, that is all good.

Travel? Not really, I have some planned.

Training too little, drinking too much, nope, both are good on that front.

If anything I am training too much and drinking too little, which, yes, is no bad thing.

Time with the lads is low and my bikes are getting dusted more than they are being cleaned of mud, but that is only because I have a full summer of planned events.

There is an impending post, one to do with this being 2026 and its significance in my history, which I probably should not write, or write and not post publicly and maybe that significance is why I am feeling in a funk.

But, you know I will write it and I will post it, if for no other reason than I need to do it.

Life is full, it is fulfilling, yet I have a niggle.

If I was giving myself my Mid Year Performance Review, I would likely put myself on a PIP...