I went to America and two ladies called me hot.

Naturally I am now looking to emigrate.

Before you jump in, my oh so faithful, yes they were real ladies and yes there were two separate occasions, in different States.

Middle of August saw me back in the US, my eighth trip overall and sixth time in four years.

I am almost a local!

Just a short trip this time, a week, but it was for a very special reason, that made me cry. Sam and Annie had their paper/legal wedding, very intimate, the couple (obviously), me and Annie's parents who are just so lovely and welcoming.

Oh and Murphy, who became an official Pawston resident with a certificate!

I met more of Annie's family and was made to feel as if I had been a part of it for years. Sam and I went on a road trip in the world's biggest and most stupid truck, seriously the top of the bonnet was at my shoulder height. OK, pipe down, I know that means it isn't that big really, but it felt like it trying to get out of the carpark! There is just this total randomness Sam and I seem to have in bars across America, there was one occasion where we were accused of being FBI or part of some New World Order because we had fake British accents. I kid you not.

We went to Connecticut first to Mystic, home of Mystic Pizza, the filming location of the 80's film of the same name. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=phKgLzz15KQ

Mystic was the location of my first 'you're hot' comments. Sam and I had food and then were deciding on what bar we should move to, he spots what looks like an Irish bar, just off the main high street.

OK, let's go. As we enter the doorman says that there is karaoke on later, they are just waiting for the DJ... One beer and we are gone then!

We are in the Harp & Hound, Mystic. http://harpandhound.com/

https://www.facebook.com/harpandhound The DJ arrives and it is a typical karaoke set up, this is going to be dire, but suddenly the bar starts to fill. Mystic is a small harbour/fishing town around 5,000 residents max, so we were pleasantly surprised at the diversity in age and ethnicity. OK, lets stay for another beer. The DJ does the opening track and then asks the first 'singer' to come up, here we go. Well, that guy suddenly pulled out some Michael Bublé style singing talent and it simply got better and better with each singer, we even had a young black guy who looked and sounded like Usher.

It was like we had walked into The Kids from Fame! These people were talented. We were amazed.

Aside from a family group everyone could properly sing.

I got a tap on the shoulder and this rather pretty but very young lady (29 FFS) uttered those immortal words. It was fun and flattering, but never going to happen, but I did add her friend (more my age and cute) on Facebook. Newport, RI next stop. I am in love with this town and State.

It is where I want to live, it is perfect. Coastal, old England style, amazing bars and shops, just idyllic.

Again we eat and then pick a bar where there is going to be live music. We perch at the bar and Sam says 'your one just walked in' and I look up to see this stunning blonde lady walk in with her friends, I say to Sam 'yeah as if she would ever look at me'.

Are you ahead of me dearest faithful?

She did look at me, a lot.

She latched on and we got chatting.

We swapped numbers.

We are friends on Insta' but life is not like the movies.

There is no future outside of liking each other's SM posts.

Distance is one factor of course. But. She's American.

She called me hot.

She clearly has excellent taste.

America clearly has excellent taste.

Therefore I belong in America. OK. I am aware that two ladies calling me hot is not sufficient evidence that I should uproot my entire life and move 4,000+ miles. But let's not get bogged down in technicalities. As apparently I am hot in America...