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I eat sweets in a certain order.

And I don't care if you don't agree. When I say 'order' I mean colour.

It's far more complicated than that, well OK, its not really, but come on I have to get you interested to keep reading somehow . I have always had a sweet tooth, my mum spoiled me in the few years we had together and I would get twenty fizzy and twenty normal Cola Bottles a day.

A Day! No wonder my teeth are from from great. OK I am also petrified of the dentist, truly phobic, so a bad coupling from day dot.

She bought them from Mrs. Askew's sweet shop at the top of the high street in the village I grew up in, some of you know that shop and will remember it well. They came in little white paper bags and would be waiting for me when I got back from school. I am still mad for cola bottles and will get them from the pic'n'mix when I go to the cinema, without fail alongside other delights, mainly jelly based, but also white Jazzies, you know the 'not really chocolate drops covered in hundreds and thousands'. Cineworld do large ones of those, terrible and delightful in equal measure. Anyway, eating sweets in order, this only really relates to 'fruit flavoured' sweets, think Jelly Tots (a firm favourite) Opal Fruits (Starburst for you younger readers), Fruit Pastilles, Wine Gums etc.

As a child I would always eat them in order of least favourite to most, saving my best flavour until last. With Opal Fruits I'd open the whole packet to see what was in there and be really disappointed if red dominated. This order is, ascending: Red, normally strawberry and my least favourite

Black, blackcurrant

Green, lime

Yellow, lemon

Orange, orange flavour funnily enough and my favourite as a child. Except. Jelly Tots. That order changes and I keep the black ones until last as the flavour of them is sublime. There it is.

That's it. Not really ground breaking, just another insight into your author and his habits. No, I'm not weird, you are...

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